Monday, September 29, 2008
No, It has nothing to do with Halloween approaching, but something, Scarier!
Most of you are really going to laugh.
Justin is going hunting and he leaves in a few days.
This really freaks me out!!!! I start getting all upset. I have really tried in the past to have a good attitude and be supportive. But when he comes home with stories of being stalked by a bear and when he comes home with a wrecked truck..... what am I supposed to think? In His defense I always get freaky weird when he is leaving me. We have only spent very few nights apart in our nearly fourteen years. I was like this before he brought home any stories or wrecked trucks. I feel very much like I am co-dependent. hmmmmm.
Any way it starts out slow, the weirdness, I mean. First normally he only leaves for hunting on a saturday and comes home by wednesday. Maybe 4 days tops and it is agony for me! This year he told me he would be gone for 9 days! Is he trying to kill me?!?
I have already started the process of getting freaky. I started shutting down emotionally yesterday, yes he knows this.... He can feel it. We are so close and so connected to each other that we automatically know when there has been a shift in one of our moods or attitudes. I can't explain it. I just know how it works for us. I crave my husband and when he is not around I feel like I am being starved. Even when he works long days I feel very off kilter.
I am really trying to be supportive and happy for him. I am just not pulling it off very well. I don't know why he thinks we need a bunch of elk in the freezer taking up valuable beef space? But he does! He doesn't even cook!!! Hello chef always gets to pick!!!
So back to the freaky part, I know by Friday I will be a total emotional wreck. First the shutting down, and then the freaking out that he is leaving me, then shutting down again. All the while I still have to be in control for my kids. So all of this freaking out will be done in my room with the door closed and a really thick pillow over my head.
In years past I tried to be a big girl. One year, I was doing a fantastic job until I came across a movie that sounded awesome, so the day before he left I watched "The Notebook". There should have been a warning label on that Gem. "Keep out of reach of emotionally fragile women!"
that one sent me over the edge. This year I am just hoping I can shut down emotionally and be done with it. No crying or throwing a temper tantrum......
One year I redecorated the bathroom, this year I hope to paint (I hate painting), I guess the psycho in me wants to compound the misery.
I am also starting 2 group bible studies while he is gone. I think I will be okay. I am finally done with the Twilight series of books so I know that won't throw any extra emotional crap into the mix. Lovely as they were I was always in tears.
I think we will be getting alot of FUNNY movies to watch as well. And well if any one would love to come and keep me company that would be FANTASTIC!!!
And So to the freaky weirdness that overcomes me I say:
"Be Gentle, Justin would really appreciate it, and so would I"
Thursday, September 25, 2008
It is so cool, there are literally thousands of books listed and reviewed and the cool part is they are kids books. Yes, I said kids books, I always know what I want to read, but I have a hard time finding a book that the kids will enjoy. Since I don't generally solicit this type of info from my friends. I could really use this great site. I felt just utter joy as I came upon it.
Being a book worm I get a warm and fuzzy feeling all over when ever I see books or walk into the library or the bookstore. I could spend hours upon hours inside Borders. Just looking at the covers and caressing the books. The other thing is that I am not picky if the books are used either! It is one of my most delightful ,fetishes.... Reading. I have an odd collection of book marks as well. They are very colorful. It just so happens that I decided I wanted to use paint chips from the paint department at my local hardware store. Now every time we go into the store the kids go and grab the colors that strike their fancy and then when we get home we deposite them into the box with all of the other paint chips of various colors and sizes. Now here is the really weird part. I am very careful to coordinate my paint chip book mark with the cover of the book.
It must be a Fetish! A very color-coordinated fetish if I do say so myself.....
Thursday, September 18, 2008
I mean, even animals clean themselves.... right?
That being said I am the first to admit that I have on occasion forgotten to put on my deodorant. I never thought that I would be like that but it happens. So as a precaution I ALWAYS let me repeat ALWAYS carry a small stick of deodorant in my purse! If you have had the misfortune to smell me I sincerely apologize.
Now let me tell you about my rather unpleasant adventure from this afternoon.
Everyone knows I really cannot stand to smell someone else stink, when there is no excuse for it. I used to be rather outspoken about it. However, I am now a little less mean about it and I really try to be compassionate. Truly it is only the work of God in my life. May he keep working !!!!!
Today Ashton and Elyssa and I went on our usual weekly grocery shopping trip. Everything went very smooth and we were rounding the last bend in the store when low and behold I am totally and completely assailed by a smell, no an odor, so nasty I almost passed out. Ashton immediately buried his little head into his shirt. Elyssa grabbed her nose and held her breath, looking at me to save her. Here I am trying to be the voice of reason quietly saying "just be polite, walk on don't say anything...." Phew finally we were out of the green cloud and the kids decide to let fly exactly what is going on in their precious little minds. I looked up and saw a back packer, that matched the one that created that stink just moments earlier. I quickly shushed the kids and when we were clear I told them that good hygiene is not a natural instinct for some people but rather a learned behavior. These people had apparently never learned the behavior. Does it seem right that I should have to encounter this smell more than once in a lifetime......NO!!!! But apparently the Devil had other plans. Do you know that in every way I tried to avoid those two men. We were in a rather large store and in my efforts to evade the stinkers. I ran smack into the green cloud 4 times!!!!!! 4TIMES!!!!! when I say I ran into the green cloud you have to understand that even from 50 feet away you could smell them. Every last time that I ran into them, They crossed MY path. OK now how bad could it really have been you ask? Well let me tell you, (this may get graphic) Elyssa asked, "Mom are you crying?" Right about the time I started gagging and dry heaving in the middle of the store, And then she told me that she threw up in her mouth.... Ashton was very quiet but he did put his whole head into his shirt as we were walking by the cloud. And asked how much longer??? For some one like me who is generally a BO-aphobe. This was literally a horrific terrorizing waking nightmare!
I think I may need therapy...... but more than that THEY need to go run in the sprinklers at the nearest public park. For them, I am praying that they get caught up in a really hard rain storm.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Justin playing in the canyon.... this was our sort of church/ worship time it was really cool........
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
We had a really great time camping, it was an awesome trip.....This picture shows me about ready to cry.... I was Shat upon!!!!!! If you look really close you can see that a nasty little bird decided to take a poop right on me. I was just walking along enjoying the nice morning and low and behold somethng like a big, fat, wet, warm, raindrop landed on my chest. I looked up to see if it was going to rain but there was not a single cloud in the sky... not one!!!! so naturally hand goes to wet spot to investigate. It was nasty, I didn't dare move for fear of spreading it. Justin and I were walking along taking photos of the kids. I couldn't believe it when Justin told me I had been dive bombed by a bird. The saddest part of it all was when he started laughing at me and raised the camera and got a shot of the MESS before I could turn and defend myself.
Did I mention that I had burned my hand really bad while making breakfast? so my right hand was all tied up in a wet cold rag and he had no sypathy for me. I really did want to cry right then and there. Lucky for me he was nice enough to take my cold wet rag away and clean up the mess.
The rest of the trip went very well we had a nice hike and I made Justin go up on a really high rock and play his guitar so I could get some photos. He was really a good sport about it. The lake was really low so we did not swim but we did catch a frog! Elyssa was ecstatic!!! My Buttermilk syrup was auctioned off for $9 a jar.....
We came home Sunday afternoon. On monday morning I decided I really needed to start homeschooling, we were 2 weeks behind!!! It all went well except that my internet connection was extremely slow as usual. I am happy to report after 2 days of homeschooling we are all still intact and no one has any lingering ill effects. Although it is clear that one of my children needs an attitude ADJUSTMENT. We are working on that.....
The best news of the week though has to be that we are getting rid of our slower than dirt dial up connection and we are getting high speed wireless internet. YEE HAWW!!!!!
I don't know if I am more excited or if Ashton is. He can now connect our Wii online to battle his Uncle John on Guitar Hero. As a trade off we are going to cancel our home phone and just use our cell phones for calling around.
I CAN'T WAIT!!!!!
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
So this leaves me with alot of free time on my hands. HMMMM, What to do? As I write this blog I am at my mom's going to have breakfast with her. Then maybe go to the library and pick out some books and movies and lastly just veg out. Justin picked this week to work long days ;0(
hopefully I will get a chance to go to IKEA or to Tai Pan Trading. Maybe I will paint my toenails.
Who knows I might even go to Starbucks and have a Carmel Macciato :0)
Mostly I think I will just enjoy some MOMMY time......